Things that make the sky fall....

Well, not literally.... just building up on the fact that someone said that if I did something, that would cause the sky to fall... apparently, it's THAT impossible...

What's interesting, though... is that I have been doing that very same thing since last Sunday, which is like yesterday, so maybe not for so long, but seeing that the record before was for like 5 minutes, that seems to be something....

Moving on... it's funny how we meet different types of people in our life.... and how they impact our life in really weird ways, and the last thing you expect a person to do, is usually the first thing that they almost always unintentionally do. At least, I hope it is unintentional. Otherwise, it's just, mean.... So what is life really about then? If the people that you seem to be able to trust, in one quick step, just turn tables so fast that you didn't even know what caused diamonds to be there.... but then they are, and some are blood, due to the amount of torture the retrievers go through... and others, just of happiness, and that is usually because of the revelation behind it... though it has to be admitted that some revelations are better than others....

point is, when the mountain is being sledgehammered or something to get the diamond out, what's the mountain to do. it trusted the people enough to let them in its depth, and frankly, the other mountain's across the ranges already look at it as the one the never flinches, no matter how many sledgehammers, no matter how many holes... and then there are the people themselves, who if it even for slightly occurred to them that what they do actually causes the mountain any hurt, ie. it is capable of feeling the pain, they would have never done it. At least, that's what i'm gathering based on the theories of what humans should really be like....

so you see, this dilemma, that is not so new, is just perplexing... befuddling.... any other stupid sounding word that means the same thing... but life goes on anyway.... and human and nature continue to coexist.... or what passes for them anyway....

it's all.. super duper super super confusing.... maybe the mountain should do something about it.... :) before losing the guts to do something...

i just love how blogs help you sort out your thinking :))

Fact file #5 : Screwing over fact files

this never got posted the last time i put it up, goodness know why.. .
and honestly, even i don't remember what i typed... because that's just what life is.. everything that happens soon passes on to make place for something else to happen, and chances are, no matter how much you hold on to it, it flows through, the harder you grasp, the faster the water flows through your fists....

so maybe the right thing is to just open your palms up wide, embrace each fresh new drop of fluid that has a reason to be there, and bid farewell to the other drops that are leaving... well, they never made a mark on you, i have no idea why, but when you think about it, it's more like wine flowing through water, forever changing the colour and the texture..... but that's not the point...

but then again, i don't know what the point is, because just like those drops of water that probably didn't mean anything anyway passes through my open palms, the thoughts keep flowing, none is better than the other, or even if it is, not like i'm a good judge for it, but the thing is, it is there, whether you want it to be or not, so might as well be happy with it... right?

NO. you can control your thoughts, it's just easier not to. doesn't man you can't. i've tried before and it's freakin hard, but it can happen, and with constant practice becomes easier too, but once in a while, i don't like to control it, just see what passes through, and on the rare occasions, i don't filter it, okay, so maybe i filter it a little, but for the most part i just let it flow as i type as fast as i can, which means to say that whatever that i'm not fast enough to type just passes on unnoticed... i don't do this because of some aim i'm trying to achieve or anything.. no... i just wanna write.. and when i wanna write i don't think, especially when i just woke up, and my brain is so numb... now if my gp teacher sees this, she'll probably just roll her eyes and give me hell the next day, but i'd rather keep on typing, coz if my fingers stop moving, i will sooner or later start thinking.... oops new para

and i don't wanna start thinking.. coz i have exams coming up, for which i haven't even started preparing, i screwed one up today, and i'm gonna screw up more things as time passe on, coz that's jut what ppl do.. how else do we learn? screwing things up once in while not only is good, but it is encouraged, how else would you noe whether or not you're pushing your boundaries? how else will you noe what are you capable of? like put in words of some song that i can't think of the title, you have to soar high and push the boundaries before you realise there are no boundaries.. oh, wait, the songs called NO BOUNDARIES -.- ..

don't worry, i shall kill myself for being so dumb sooner or later, but otherwise, life is fun. as in i'm not kidding or being sarcastic, it REALLY IS fun :D so yeah.. brain numbness = no expression on my face, but you get the point.. and this blog is not about the chimness or whatever heck of crap ppl seem to think it's filled with, it's about being retarded and happy about it :D

it's so that, when i look back i also know that i had no regrets and shall continue to strive for only that one goal...

and no link, but heck yeah, SCREW FACT FILES :D

whoa.....

OMG... I had to post this, because Facebook cannot be accesse due to problems in the site? aww.... zuckenberg is going to be so.... sad... ... :

Fact file #4 : the precedence in Pluto

I don't know where this came from, but just felt like saying it.
something i figured out from someone i hold very dearly in my heart, though no one knows why. or even knows. because somethings are not meant to be said. so maybe i won't post this. one day, i will look at it and smile, and know that my life was something to me (:

just a tiny simple fact about a certain type of species in this world : the mankind. literally.
guys can be vulgar, live with it.

when you've known a guy, he can be either super vulgar or super nice to you.
if he's super nice than he usually is, then you may or may not take the bet
if a guy gets super vulgar to you, either that's how he treats people, or he's pretending really hard to not like you.
Or he's just an idiot.
but for the chance of it we say that he isn't,
either he thinks you're close enough and takes it that you ill know exactly what he means, don't be an idiot. talk, not shout. understand, not know-it-all.
or.... he's just freaked out about falling for you.
don't be a baby. don't treat him like a baby.
and don't be an idiot.
or, as in the case of the first scenario, he really is an idiot.

know that change is inevitable, and now that there's always hope for change.
but never trust a person who changes for you. one day they will change for someone else.
people always change for themselves. look for that one person who needs to change for himself to be with you. that one person who despite not wanting to acknowledge it, wants to do things for himself, just to know what it feels like to be with you, and then likes it enough to want to change his preference, not himself. principles are important. but despite the strength of the pillars someone manages to dig a hole below the foundation and shake it thoroughly, pay him attention.
he may not be the one, but he definitely is something.

know your heart. know your mind. know your soul. but most importantly, know yourself.
on second thoughts, maybe i should post this. and if you're reading it, thanks. you will always be remembered. (:

Fact file #3 : Procrastination

Something I am amazingly and innately good at.
For example, this tab? opened at 8.27 pm
Typing at 2.59am
so sleepy to the point that i don't even wanna begin to type what i wanted to say in the first place.
So that comes another day, whenever i get time again :D


~ i like deadlines. I like the swooshing sound it makes as it flies by you ~

Fact file #2 : The Earth

~a soft spot for school makes a tough rock in the aortic pumps ~

The earth doesn't stop revolving. not for anyone. Not even for the President of US

IF a great lump of rock that is floating around in the vacuum space doesn't give a damn about what's happening in the life of the most important man in the world, what makes you think anyone else gives a damn about what's happening in yours?!

the earth has its very own core, and revolves about it, undisturbed by anything that's happening around it, not even to itself. So with our own epicentre on tow, we move on to, despite all the disappointments, the hurts, the cuts that bleed, the arrhythmia that attacks, the wounds that sting. BECAUSE LIFE GOES ON

Just like the earth, we have our own core, untouched by anyone out there, but just like the earth, everyone is trying to get to it. to try and extract from it the essence that is you. all the while making you believe it is for your own good.

The earth is protected from the lawyers not from the geologists. the space from doctors, not astronauts. everything has a weak spot. the problem is, everyone is in delusion. The geologists think they are doing earth a favor. The astronauts think they are making space interesting. But alas, the damage is by them truly. Thank god the space is a vacuum that holds nothing. What can you pull out of nothing right? (presuming of course, that you are not a magician, Barney Stinson or Leroy Jethro Gibbs)

But unfortunately, humans strive for excellence, or what they think is the excellent in them.. and the repercussions are fatal. Seriously. The only thing that keeps the earth going, is the little solitude in her, the knowledge that no matter how much the humans step on her, trod on every inch of her, make a complete nuisance of themselves around her, she is always bigger than them.. All of them put together. AND WILL CONTINUE TO BE SO TIL SHE FLIPS OUT AND KILLS THEM ALL...

~go on despite everything for it is guaranteed that it always gets better. ALWAYS.... for there is no such thing as perfection, but definitely a thing called roller coaster. so... keep hoping.... ~

Fact file #1 : Holidays

~today you made me really happy, so i can't say anything, but i will smile, and look forward to the next time it will be this good ~

Holidays
they are... an interesting... phenomenon.
Can't live with them, can't do without them....

I had like a million things to say, but now i'm speechless.
you know why? yup.. because it's holidays...
sometimes you just don't wanna care about anything and everything, i mean holidays should mean that you get to take leave off everything, education, emotion, responsibility, facades, why should anything NOT be included?

Wanna hear the sob story of our lies, though?
NOTHING is a holiday, not even our normal holiday...

Come on, think about it.
what can you leave behind just because it is holidays?
Whatever you feel? whatever you wanted to do? Your hopes, dreams and aspirations? Can you even leave your school/work work behind you in this day and age? (of course, if you're in high school or below, i have nothing to say to you except enjoy the remnants of your life while you still can =.=)

Point is, looks like we now have to change our entire life into a ...... lagged holidays if we are ever to be able to kick back, and that brings forth everything we have been doing, or are planning to do.

My holidays are supposed to be the time when i have NO responsibilities at all. Like NONE. But now i have more.. because... well, because of many many reasons. That's not the point. The blog's not about me. IT's never about me. Let's move on.

Okay, i don't know the point of this. I don't think there is a point. I just wanted to put it out there. Coz the world now is not just water and natural resources deprived, it's also most definitely holiday deprived.
And noone's doing anything about it.

So, who's gonna be the next Nobel laureate, ladies and gentlemen? we just found a crisis, someone, find a solution.

~ things happen for a reason, things don't. right now, i'm down enough to check the phone a million times, waiting for that text, but we both know frog-style can't wait :) ~

penang ftw :D

~ first you just owed me lobster, now you owe me more, but it feels like you totally forgot. About everything.... ~

Haha.. nothing much to say, but PENANG deserves a post just for being its awesome self
so here you go.
a shoutout to the island :))
the mainland :))
the people :))
the food :))
and everything in between :))

haha... just can't stop smiling...
the only thing i miss? mobility, and i don't mind that that much too, thanks to my parents being awesome.. haha


and the tv, like finally, feels like i'm not imited by my laptop screen anymore.. XD

so, yeah.. till next time then

~ I'm gonna keep laughing and smiling, because otherwise it just hurts. just a little. just enough to remind me of you.. ~

because it hurts...

--- i'll smile because it happened, and i'll smile because it'll make you smile as not only did it happen, it's also over ---

Yes, this is going to be one of those posts that dwell on the mediocrity and the fluidity that is life, so if you're here looking for one of those really hyper optimistic ones i write, you can move on.....

OR you can try this out. Your call.

Today i was reminded of how closely associated our life is to the ocean. Not only do we depend on it for the resources that makes a difference, look towards it as an indicator as to how damaged our life on earth really is, and observe it to bring the variety that makes life worth living, our lives themselves are nothing other than the big vast ocean and everything it holds, with every being on the planet on a simple lonely raft.

Yes, bump onto other objects once in a while; boulders that hold us back momentarily or change the course of our lives, corals and other beauty that make you wanna sink the pedal deep and stay there a moment, or - worst case scenario - an incident that needs you to stop on a deserted island to repair the raft.

Inevitably, this brings us to crossing paths between many rafts.... some willingly changing the direction, made possible by the wonders of newton's discoveries, others reluctantly, but often with surprising results. But even when you get comfortable with where you are, where your paths has crossed, and how the situation is, there's always a reason to move on. To discover more, to challenge more, and to reach the ends of the world. So, there's a goodbye to be bode.

Because it takes a lot of courage to step onto a deserted island with someone else, food is scarce and cannibalism becomes an option thanks to the aura it holds. But the deep unfathomable dank aura is not what this is about, so lets move on. Point is, it takes a LOT of courage. Sadly, though, this is extremely vital, because it is almost impossible to simply hop onto another's raft without joining the rafts together, and even more impossible to survive long terms in cramped spaces, especially when the hurricane calls upon the banshee, pushing and pulling the strings holding the tides as it wills.....

But when the courage is there, when the beings' hearts are both set ablaze, this fire, this fury that melts anything it touches and scorches anything it doesn't both ensures survival and makes survival unimportant. After all, not all soul searching sailors have to end up in a story like that of titanic. There's always the nicer version of it, just untold due the lesser appeal of happy endings in this world, that previously didn't need them, and now don't believe in them.

Stories like that are hard to find, and certainly is not a part of this. This.... is more than just that. This is not only about the courage to throw caution into the winds, but this.... is the courage, the cold blue fury-whipped kind.. that has to exist before goodbyes between linked palms (and more) can.

Because, believe it or not, you're moving away, carried by the tide initially, but are you peddling towards or away from me, i cannot tell now. I really can't. And did you know that the seawater and the salt-saturated wind stings your eyes if you take off the goggles that both restrict your sight and protect your soul? So, I'll let the tides carry me for now, I'll let the almighty wind poke and prod at me as it pleases.... and I'll hope that some day we'll meet again. And the same link remains. Because in my heart, it forever will.

But for now, i wish you all the best in conquering new horizons.

~ because you made water seem like solid ground, and the less viscous it becomes, the more i miss you :"/ ~

perspicacious....

~ if i'm addicted to loving you, and you're addicted to my love too, we can be them to birds of a feather, that flock together ~

i can't write
not today
not right now
not with these thoughts in my head still
would there ever be an ending to this?

oh, please tell me there will be
it may make me smile
but the onion effect helps to no extent
for there is a difference
between the watery and the solid
and everything in between

i used to be a strong proponent
"there is a great wall of china
between love and hate"
but it took me this long to realise that there are doors
and the walls held up by blood
as well as sweat and tears
when will it all end?

I listen to you speak
i cannot utter a single word in response
if it can overwhelm even your feelings
what chance do words have?
you may say music says it all
but do we sing the same tune?
when the tune of love differs even within me?

the pinnacle is there
but so are the eggshells
what would my choice be
i can never tell
when noone wins and noone loses
do we still have to play this game?

so i stand here, utterly speechless
trying hard to keep all of it in
but what's the point?
if it's like a volcano already....

one last word then... before this is over....
to let you know why this is still going on
when i see you, i smile
because you are happy
and that's all that matters ....

perspective is a beautiful thing....

~ gravity is not responsible for people falling in love ~

I haven't posted in ages... but that's just coz there are waaay too many...complications, shall we call it.? ....

and it's not right to find sense anywhere else, till the complications do....

so maybe i'l stop here tonight as well...

and maybe 2moro it'll be all better?

:)

into the blue....

okay, so I don't post up lyrics much.... I mean, I didn't exactly write them now did I?
*ponders* (maybe I should start posting more.. after all, they are awesome....)

but that's NOT the point now :
the following lyrics are from sara jackson, into the blue.
Never heard of her before, but it was played at the ending of the last episode of season 2 of castle.... *can't wait for season 3*

but despite the emotional turmoil in the show, I was still pulled towards the words... well, you can imagine..... anyway, just......breathe it in and you'll see what it does to you :))

.....45 seconds later.....

haha... i dunno how to copy the lyrics in.... and typing is.... a pain... when i gotta keep switching tabs.... i should probably just link the video first.... argh... never mind...

*starts painstakingly typing*

if only if only i coulda been yours
been your rapport and yours to adore
if only if only i would've said yes
forgotten the rest, oh i could've said yes
if only if only you'd ask me again
I'd give you my hand
let you take me
across the sand

into the blue
and faded world of my daydreams
I feel i'm falling deeper everyday
melting away down a dark and endless abyss
I'm grasping at straws and I'm chasing the wind
as i fall on my face over and over again

if only if only i had the luxury of retrospect
sounds like you're speaking some sort of foreign dialect
if only something as precious as time had a price
instead of endlessly taking its toll on my soul
oh, so many if onlys running through my mind
what ifs and storybook endings time after time
if only if only you could've been mine
i'd take you

into the blue
and faded world of my daydreams
I feel I'm falling deeper everyday
melting away down a dark and endless abyss
I'm grasping at straws and I'm chasing the world
As I fall on my face over and over again

~ because in the end, it's you that I want to look up to and smile at ~

Glosses on glasses...

and said Barney Stinson :
~ let me teach you how to live ~

Today we were to write down our goals, coz apparently with goals, we know what we want, and then we'll know how we are to get there, and only then will we be getting there... yada yada yada....
not that i have a problem with the system, i mean, it makes perfect sense and everything.
but if it were true : wait for it.... i'm like the underachiever of the century

goals goals goals... not only was our teacher making fun out of setting up goal posts, my brain resembled it to. it looked like it had perfect frame, but it was substantiated by net. so anything as fluid as thoughts flowed right throughout. even the most viscous ones.... because i realised my goal, was pretty simple.
let's try and make it simpler by breaking my life into two parts; the dream state (which honestly, i spend about 17 hours a day in, but for simplicity's sake, lets only count the time when i'm actually sleeping) and the waking state.

Dream state : If I wake up on the day, and despite nightmares or airport dreams, i smile, there you go, goal achieved.

Waking state : If i can go to sleep at night, but right before that splash of water onto the face and the capping of the toothpaste tub, if i can smile and mean it, en voila.

Why can't everything be this simple? and why is this not goal enough for the school? is being mediocre really that bad? everyone's completely blissful when being mediocre, really. it's just that the difference comes in when different ppl have different level of mediocrity, and yet, we are expected to equalise the playing field. WHY? I mean, don't get me wrong and everything, i think it's wonderful that ppl push themselves, it's wonderful that there are millions of awesome ppl out there... but someone just yesterday told me, and then made me feel stupid, coz well, it's like the most obvious things out there : there's like 7 billion ppl out there. whatever you end up doing, chances are, someone somewhere have already done it, is currently doing it, or will do it soon. It's that simple.

So why the yardstick? proposed by someone (probably a really smart someone too) that humans need something to spur them into action. without that subconscious knocking against the glass door, ready to break it into shards small enough to pass through vessels and still leave it unscathed, without someone holding a hammer and liquid nitrogen with a sinister smile on their face, or without that dog on the other side really wanting to take a walk, we are settled. and unperturbed. and going to do nothing about it. LITERALLY NOTHING (i'm begging you, please don't take into account that breathing and stupid vital stuffs that don't help me prove my point, :P )

*pauses*
wait, what's my point again?

Okay, i don't know. but that's besides the point.
so follow this :

1) smile
2) grin, dude
3) oh, show your freakin teeth already, what you haven't brushed in eons or something?
4) now make a retarded face
5) laugh, loudly
6) do exactly what you want to do
7) understand that being responsible is not equal to being serious :))
8) please get back to work so that your bosses or teachers don't come running after me ;)


and that's it!!! step by step guide to..... earning weird stares from everyone around you....
if you didn't, either you're alone (are we ever, really?) or get the heck outta wherever you are, coz the ppl around YOU are creeping ME out ...

bottom-line : smile, be happy, be blissful, and please dear god, get some sleep :))

P.P.S. hugs to the girl (kinda scared she'll kill me if i mention her name....hehe) who's one of the most optimistic person i've met here <3

~seriousness is giving unnecessary importance to something, at the cost of everything else~

in the end....

It's all good in life at the end of it all?
and you know why? because we say so. because we have faith that it is so. and because, even when it isn't, there's this tiny sliver of hope, that says, maybe it will be all the more better the next day.

optimism is a beautiful and apparently now rare thing... :
it should not be rare.... coz it's the only thing that torches the dying flame in our heart, when the aortic pump is running out of fuel...
the only thing that provides o2 to our brain, not because it can, but because we think it can
and it is the ONLY thing... that keeps the universe from collapsing upon itself, to reform the blackhole that was once present,
before optimism met pessimism and said, hey, wth,i'm gonna kick you in the ass, and be done with it.

let's keep the same spirits up :))
now more than ever.

The grey areas of a whiteboard...

I should get like one of those really hip, totally huge white boards
then hang it like beside my bed... with like this holder that holds on to like 6 different coloured markers, and probably dozens of magnets to stick papers and stuff for the fun of it
i mean, i don't have those boards that you can pin things on, which, btw, serves only one purpose, this will like serve a million and one purposes. For the price of one.

Of course, maybe it seems absurd for a student to want that kind of board, especially in an age where we're supposed to blatantly hate studying and basically any form of education (okay, maybe i'm stereotyping, but if you can point out like one student who never had the urge to throw all the books away and have fun, i'll probably be able to point out a star that's closer to earth than the sun) I mean, even sheldon in all his almightyness, had halo nights, countless hours manipulating Mario and planning the doom of Leonard-Penny relationships. but let's see :

House has a board
Castle has a board
Sheldon has a board
Leonard has a board
Gideon had a board
Tony had McGee's face to write all over
Brennan had Angela and all her technology
Gibbs, well Gibbs had a boat ( but that pretty much rhymes with board - if you're tone-deaf - and he's too awesome anyway )

SO why not me?
Idiosyncrasies and swooning over what can never be aside, a board seems like a really good idea for countless reasons.... It helps you pen down literally all your thoughts no matter what time it is, and once you're used to writing in the dark - and it's not like anyone's gonna complain about your handwriting since technically it's ALL YOURS - even your dreams and nightmares. There almost never will be a time when you'll have to stoop to the norm and say "you know, i thought about it a while ago, but i totally forgot what it is that i'm thinking about"

Besides, sometimes you need some chaos before order is an option, you know. if there's only order, that would be a chaotic one, and we all know what happens when complete chaos set in. Let's just say, nothing good. SO maybe, just maybe, multicoloured scribbles on the whiteboard that's so huge it may just be a wall with the addition of papers stuck everywhere on it, would be..... aesthetically pleasing.

And then there's the obvious reason : to provide a long-lasting marathon of the imagination. My first idea was actually to hang a long clothesline across the room before clipping different papers of different size on it, but imagine walking to a toilet in the dark. With that. Across the room. Thin and razor sharp. Makes saw look like a kiddy playground. Hmmm... that's an idea, but not a very good one. Coz it affects ppl. Me. and I am vital. to me. okay. not. making. sense. but. have. ideas. for. NEW nightmares.

But then, who ever uses it for what they say they are gonna use it for right?
So maybe it will just be another excuse for me to procrastinate, doodle non-stop, and in some way or other let art down in more ways than one.

But what the heck, i still wanna have it. always wanted one. never figured why, it was like this childhood obsession, then i got a small board for my room before realising small boards are stupid becoz if you are doodling, you have to keep erasing them off, and that's not the point of doodling. Doodling freaking gives you ideas. You don't wanna erase your ideas off a board, especially not when it's already out of subconscious which means, the chances of you delivering it out consciously ... would be harder, if not more painful, than labour. NOT that i have any experience in that sense.

Oh, for the perils of the board, and the people who look awesomely cool writing desperately important stuff on it. *swoons* well, as long as they are not boring, of course... haha... i'm not making any sense anymore.

as usual, when i stop making sense, i stop writing, though my friend holds this believe that that point is moot, because apparently, if that principle were to be true, i should NEVER write. Ah, what's life if I'm not pulling her pigtails,or braids, huh? :))

~singing off with a dilemma on what to do with the 2 buttons that left the rest. any thoughts?~

the secret ......

you wanna know why is it that life is wonderful?
it's coz you're in it...
it's coz of everyone else that you know who's in it
it's coz of ppl you know but hate and thus make you appreciate ppl you love
and it's coz of the rest of the world you're oblivious to that makes the ppl you know stand out like shining stars
if there is no dark sky, when can we ever enjoy the stars without the blazing heat
i mean, imagine like millions of stars as close t earth as planet. physically impossible as it is, if you do assume that such a condition can exist without making us extinct... it would be like insufferably hot.... which i do not think is.... nice.....

okay, so maybe i'm not making sense, but i'm writing this like in the middle of nowhere, like worse off nowhere compared to my other entries and it's like, when i'm supposed to be sleeping.
SO why am I writing instead of sleeping? because i can (:

simple right? maybe that's the point... i mean, i don't have to be a weatherman to know that the sky is blue right? i mean, okay.... i need to have like the basic concepts of colours, be non-blind or non-colour-blind.. and must not be blinded by all the hypothetical so-close-to-earth-stars i just made up.....

you know what? i'm downgrading my own writing to mere ridicule that would cause even me to view it with contempt, and so i'm signing off. NOW.

and why am i okay with being subjected to ridicule?
because when someone's waiting, you don't keep them that way for long....
especially not YOU :)

and the secret? well, there's nothing much, really, if you can't look past the previous lines .... :/

It's been long, huh?

Okay, so i haven't blogged, in like ages....
honestly i don't even know why.... mayb coz there are other stuff to be done, maybe coz my priorities aren't set straight... but a few das ago, perhaps later than necessary, i realised, i NEED to blog :S

i mean, it's not about what, you say, it's not even about how you say it, it's just about.. letting it all flow out... it's taking a step back from thinking, instead of knowing what you are saying, letting the subconscious simply take hold of the fingers, with no mind or any other form of ego come into place.

It's about getting to know the real you.......

Or maybe, it's just to crap all the bullshit out of you, so that when you go to school the next day, the brain's not as fuzzy as fuzzy wuzzy and his likes and dislikes, but instead as clear as crystals, empty enough to let anything and everything flow through you, capturing what is vital for you to shine and sparkle and well, be yourself, while letting the grime and the dirt, pass on, leaving you not just unscathed, but refined as well.

(yes, if GP's not letting me write lame stuff on the exam paper, i'm just gonna have to find another outlet, now don't i? (: )

So I just came back from camp, and besides being astounded by my lack of activeness ( okay, maybe not astounded, i mean, i don't even run a LITTLE till i came to Singapore, and my best distance has always been 2.4km) , it was a calling... one i am hoping i have to guts to respond to... but other than that, i owe it all to my friends and the seniors for being awesome, understanding, and showing me who i can be, given the chance. Enjoyed all the jungle walks ( yeah, it reminded me so much of Malaysia i was actually more fond of it than anything, NOT that i'm saying M'sia is hulu, it's just more preserved, and you can literally feel the cells soaking up O2 after that long run, so awesome timing, seniors :)) ) and the sea trainings :)

Yeah, okay, exhausted as hell wif loadsa hw to be done within the next 5 hours ( yeah, i still sleep at 10, problem? ) but i can't stop smiling. because the hardship was worth it. was worth EVERYTHING.

Mushyness aside, i think i heard from somewhere Osama is dead, have no idea if it's true, but i am hoping so... for then loadsa people will begin to sleep well again.

and i think that's it for today, for i have laundry to collect, prep for PT and lessons 2moro, and most importantly.... Cookie Crisp to school :D

~ The greatest mistake ever made by men is being afraid to make one ~

P.S. You disappointed me that day, after so long of always being there for me and I only hope you had a jolly good reason for it. If you aren't there 2moro, guess we both know what that means :(